Citizens of a small solar system in the Ursa Major constellation are being spammed grossly by inferior earthlings representing a particular earthy food company called Doritos, trying to increase sales of their flag ship product, the tortilla chips. In a 6 hour broadcast from an array of high power subspace radars on the Norwegian island of Svalbard on Earth, an MPEG file containing the ad piece was repeated over and over again, to make sure the Ursa Majorians would identify the message as intelligent.

The event has later been deemed pretty unintelligent as the inhabitants of the only habitable planet in the aforementioned solar system looks exactly like giant tortilla chips. They took the ad piece as a declaration of war, and have announced a soonish preemptive strike on Earth, probably causing the demise of the human race. As a fine example of same human race would have put it: “Doh!”

Milky Way Times is monitoring the situation and we’ll of course bring you any update as fast as possible. And don’t forget to vote on the top 5 human things you won’t miss.

*Snapping out of what seems to be an unending stream of science fiction thoughts induced by this news piece over at New Scientist.*

Now back to work on that subspace device… and maybe that runaway thoughts controller too.